Sunday, July 3
 What do you do when you are not enough? I have been struggling with this question for a while now. I know there are many times as a mother, wife and just a Christian in general that we are left with questions. I frankly, hate those times. I want to try to do something to make circumstances different. I beat myself up with the thoughts of what I should have done differently. I seem to do everything but rest in what I know. I know God is bigger than every mess that comes my way. Even the latest one. I want to say I am the picture of faith and hope, but I have failed to be that kind of example to those around me.
 One of my children is suffering, and it is the hardest thing I have ever gone through. I know it's hardest thing this child has faced as well. The battle is not one I can fight for them though. That' my struggle. I'm having to force myself to let go, and let God take over. I'm a fighter, I love hard, I've never learned the art of letting go. I know my bible, His promises, and what I should do. My mind just doesn't know how to let go.
 Now is a time when this child's walk with the Lord has to be their own personal walk, and not one shadowed by my walk. I have to rest in the knowing everything I tried to instill, everything I taught, every hug, every kiss, every heart to heart talk, was not all for not. There are many seeds of truth in that precious heart. I pray for fertile soil and a soften heart in which those seeds will grow.

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